i just wanna soil my oats bro
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
