if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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