I'm gonna have a badass scar
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I lost the right to judge tonight
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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