He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
