brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
When did angry sex become our thing?
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize
