Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
