Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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