I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
