im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
