Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Randomize
