North Korea, Best Korea!
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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