in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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