Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
The adults are the big ones right?
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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