Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
