Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Randomize
