WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
