Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
