The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
