Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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