real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
