So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
