"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
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