I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize
