There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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