Dude my mom stole all your condoms
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
organizing the empties. That sober.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
