you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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