We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
