I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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