it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize