Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize