Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
