Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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