At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
