On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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