i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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