This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
You were trust falling into bushes
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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