i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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