The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Randomize
