He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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