FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Randomize
