I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
