i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Randomize
