I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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