I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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