I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
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