I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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