It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
