New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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