She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize