thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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