I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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